A HOLIDAY REVOLUTION
WHAT WILL YOU DO FOR THE BIG DAY?
Theorists of mathematical optimization often confront the scheduling problem. A traditional scheduling problem usually concerns planning takeoffs and landings at an airfield, or timetabling semiotics seminars. But holidays also have their own scheduling problem: there are not enough days in the year for every holiday we wish to celebrate, for we at the Institute are a festive group, not averse to occasional merriment, moderate consumption of fortified wine, and, in the case of half of our Directorship, dancing.
We thus announce our latest revolutionary calibration of reality: February 14, heretofore the most oppressive of all of the holidays, will now be World Holiday Day, a day when everyone around the world can celebrate whatever holiday they choose. You can make today Happy Factorial Day!, or Billie Holiday, or Thank A Think Tank Day. For the first time in history, you have freedom.
Act now before February 14th ends!
We Talk To Horses celebrates World Holiday Day
The Institute asked We Talk To Horses, the only contemporary musical recording collective officially sanctioned by a reality calibration think tank, what holiday they will celebrate to inaugurate World Holiday Day. They sent us the following statement:
February 14 is, by tradition, a day devoted to love. So we asked: what do we love? We love feeling euphoric, and feeling depressed, and feeling lovelorn, and feeling forlorn, and feeling foreboding, and feeling crestfallen. We love wonder and mystery and majesty and ennui and the sound of a light rain on a thin window pane. And horses, dear horses, we love you too.
Since our love finds its expression in music, We Talk To Horses has decided to make today Interplanetary Mix Tape Day. To celebrate, we invite you to make a music compilation and share it with someone on Another Planet! Our mix tape’s theme is "gas station ennui" and the first song is our new single, Downtown, a song about the end of the lonesome road.
The song is available on all platforms, and you can listen to the playlist on Spotify and YouTube.
Announcing our new merch!
It’s a little known fact that We Talk To Horses is fanatical about coasters, the unsung hero of home security. What else will save our proverbial tabletops from water hazards and the harm ever-threatened by beverages hot and cold?
For one month only, we are offering a special "super saver deal" on a set of four commemorative coasters, each featuring the album artwork from a We Talk To Horses single, probably hand-painted by a member of the band. If you order, we will need to figure out how to make a coaster, source the materials, and then paint them. Accounting for the mess we will make and the general inconvenience to us, we are pricing these at $10,000 for the set. Within Canada only, because we don’t want to deal with exporting artworks.
Love you!
For all We Talk To Horses merch, please visit the General Store.